Parties and Such

I've been wanting to post an update for a few weeks, and there have been two reasons why I haven't.  1) I haven't been doing so well going to the gym or eating well - not terribly, but not awesome.  Like mediocre.  That's been making me feel bad and generally bringing my mood down.  2)  My computer has been sucking balls.  It's a few (read 5-6) years old and the insides were getting gunky.  You know the drill - 5 minutes to switch between browser tabs, etc.  

But I have great news - I overcame my computer problems and fixed them myself.  And now it works great.  Even though I apparently need new RAM or memory or both or something.

Last night, the throwback PSP party happened!  I organized it, no big deal, and it went off without a hitch despite my irrational anxiety about it beforehand.  The cops only came once and we kicked the keg and everyone seemed to have a really great time.  Success!  There were a few people who were unable to come that I really would have loved to see, but, there's always another time.  I also handled my anxiety really well during the entire thing - didn't black out, paced myself, and was sober without spins when I got home.  Also didn't have that usual drunk shame the next day.

My overall blahness is still around.  I'm going to the gym all this week, so that should help.  Otherwise, I just need another hobby or project or something to work on.  I was working on cleaning my crap up and starting to digitize all of my old paper files that are hanging around.  But that's less than inspiring.

So, I don't know, we'll see.  I feel like January and February are always the hardness months for me personally to shake off my depression and anxiety issues.  Especially with all the changes that have been going on lately.  Guess I"ll just keep on keeping on.

Ordering Drinks

In my post-collegiate career, there are several things I've really come to value - one being able to keep in contact with friends from college and continuing relationships past the classes we endured together.

Tonight I went out with a great friend and it was super fun!  Fortunately, we've kept in touch after college and get together pretty frequently (considering the distance between Philly and where she lives and works).  It's always a great time, I love catching up with her.

Tonight, the first drink I ordered was a dirty martini - it was filthy   She asked to taste it and ended up loving it, as a true Russian would, admitting to me that she didn't understand the language to order the drink and had gotten some bad martinis.

Understandable - I have had some awful martinis.  Every girl who has watched Sex in the City has ordered bad martinis, because no one ever covers the vernacular necessary to order them!

Martinis are either gin or vodka (originally gin and snobs will judge you for ordering vodka) and a splash of vermouth.  It comes with either olives (generally speaking, a dirty martini will get you liquor, vermouth and olive juice) or with a lemon twist.  Basically, a super alcoholic, classy-ass drink with it's own language.

So here it is, broken down, for all of our sakes from the Huffington Post.

• If you order a dry martini it means that you'd like less vermouth in your cocktail. A very dry martini would contain little to no vermouth; one might just roll the vermouth in the glass so that a thin film coats it -- nothing more.

• As you might imagine, ordering a wet martini will get you more vermouth in your cocktail than the standard five-to-one ratio.

• A dirty martini, a fairly popular version, uses olive brine or olive juice for an additional kick. If you're a fan of olives, this might be the best option for you.

• If you'd like your martini with lemon instead of olives ask for it with a twist. And if you are a fan of olives, and maybe a little hungry, it's not uncommon to ask for extras.

I personally prefer dry vodka martinis, dirty, shaken.  With blue cheese stuffed olives.  I would absolutely recommend a beginner getting a very dirty martini, the olive juice cuts the liquor taste and makes it bearable.

Try it out next time you go to a bar!  But make sure someone else is there to drink it in case you absolutely hate it!  But beware, they are addictive.

And there's a mini lesson in drink ordering.

Thank goodness for good friends and good drinks!  Cheers

2011 and so much has happened

I haven't blogged since October.
Yes, I know.
You didn't miss me!

Mostly, I haven't blogged because there's no direction for this space. My roomie Liz has a wonderful blog, Dance to the Radio, dedicated mostly to music, some to fashion.  And she does a wonderful job because that's her jawn.  But what's my jawn?  One of my other friends had a hard time getting me a Christmas gift, just because my interests are super specific, and they usually change with the position of the moon.

And I definitely don't want to talk about my life.  Okay, of course I do, doesn't everyone?  But...  A.) gossip mill.  B.)  dramz.  C.) if none of the above, dull at best.  I could talk about my cat and her idiosyncrasies, but I'm not ready to be labeled as an old cat lady yet.

So, I guess I need suggestions on topics.  Or something.  Direction on what to do here and in my life would be much appreciated.  Especially since I am apparently not a Gemini anymore.

2010 was a year.  I believe that's what 365 consecutive days are called.  I finished college, started grad school, went further in debt, moved, was single, then was not, went to Florida, celebrated holidays and birthdays, and generally trudged through the year.

Okay, that was a really bad reflection.

For now, let me share some goals for 2011, I'm done with 2010.  That is ancient history.
1.  Find a "real" job.
Finding a real job requires effort and showers.  Don't know if I'm up for it yet.  I keep applying and taking personality tests and aptitude tests.  But the going is slow.  Especially since I lack direction on a career and a location.  Sense a theme?

2.  Lose 30 lbs by the end of May, 50 by September.
People hate this.  They think it is unhealthy and whatnot.  Some people don't want to hear about it at all. Like my life isn't supposed to be like The Biggest Loser. REAL people don't weigh that much.  Anyway, I don't hate this goal yet, but talk to me in a week when my legs don't work anymore and all I want is a hot, steaming bowl of delicious macaroni and cheese with a side of black forest cake loaded with vanilla ice cream.  If my arms aren't so sore that I can't lift the fork to my face.

3.  Finish grad school...
...without punching someone in the face or failing a class due to lack of interest.

4.  Finish Landmark curriculum.
I took a great class called Landmark that basically gave me the tools to handle life and make it work.  Despite the teasing by most friends, I found it really helpful and am continuing the education so that I can live with direction and power.  So that's on the list...

5.  Write a novel/screenplay in a month.
This is going to happen in February or April.  I'm so excited.  No showers necessary.

6.  Learn Espanol.
Enough to get by in Tijuana.

Goals, goals, goals.  This year, the score is going to be Universe: 1,297,283 Me: 6

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to get through this crazy professor's boring ass economics class.  Then I have a date at an Irish Pub with an Irish bartendar.  I really wish alcohol was zero calories.

Skalley-wags

My favorite class this term is ECON 698, Economics of Social Justice.  While its super interesting, its a lot of reading.

I got cut from work early on Sunday, and thank goodness because apparently I accidentally stole and iPhone and didn't even know it.  Talk about out of it.  So ANYWAY, around 10 I went to the bar down the street to visit a friend, drink, get some food, and celebrate Sunday Funday.  I sat at the bar by myself and kept reading my homework in between bantering with some of the servers and bartenders.  

These two cute dudes sat down next to me.

I proceeded to ignore them.

Mad Mex clothes + Mad Mex stench + Mad Mex attitude = NOT DOING IT.

After about 90 minutes, one of them started talking to me.

"Hey, what are you reading?"

"I'm reading about economics and religion in historic Europe.  Basically, this Chapter is about why Jewish people are considered stingy and rich."

"Oh, where do you go to school"

"Drexel"

"Oh, me too! I'm going to be a doctor!"

"Cool. I'm getting my MBA."

"Soooo, how are you going to remember what you're reading after four beers?"

"You're counting my beers?"

"uhhhhhh"

"I'm an alcoholic. And I have homework.  This is my solution. It's not like I'm ever going to be operating on anyone."

We talked about other things but I was disenchanted and I really really needed to finish the last 2 pages before I passed the productive part of my drinking.

They left.  Finally.

This was only one of my random stranger conversations this weekend.  Generally, I shy away from them, but being a server negates being shy.  I had another conversation about what Drexel kids think of Penn kids.  This was my take:

"I mean, there's always exceptions to the rule, but in general, Penn kids are snobby, always right, the most important people in the room, and they can't order correctly, be polite, or look at you like you're a human being.  Then they wave Daddy's Black 5 lb Amex card under your nose and proceed to tip you 10%.  And that's how I feel about Penn kids."

Me and the 911 dispatcher got rull close this weekend too.  Some dude puked all over his lap, chugged a beer, then asked for another one.  After being told "no, get out" he proceeded to almost start a fight.  And here were his parting words:

"its all cool when a dude comes in and spends all his money but as soon as he starts puking it's like dude get out!" (now, replace dude with the n-word...uh, yeaaaaa).  While he and his 15 person posse were waiting for all the employees to leave the building, he fell off a ledge and couldn't move.  I politely went over and said "hey guys, everything okay?  need any help?"  "nah man nah"

Okay.  Dial 911.

Twice.

Cuz they started fighting.

Like the dudes on Friday who tried to start fighting with the kitchen guys at 1:30 a.m.  "I'M FRESH OUT DA FEDERAL."

Oy.

So, what I learned this weekend:

1. Jewish people have that rich/stingy stigma attached to them because back in the day it was considered immoral to lend money at interest to people.  Back when the Christian church ran things.  But since Jews were going to hell anyway, they could lend money to anyone.  And then, because they were rich and hated and had a common language, they started dealing in small goods, like gems and gold because those things were easily hidden and available/valuable all over Europe.
2. People are uncouth, unpredictable, and they suck a little.  Or they're really cool.  There's just no way to know, and there's no way to avoid the stupid ones.
3. This new work schedule may kill me.  Or cause me to kill.
4. If a table hands you a stack of dishes, and their iPhone is inbetween two plates, its still your fault that the phone got "stolen" even if you return it.  

Fortunately, I have class all week and I can learn even more.  My brains are starting to fry....

Maximizing Utility

And there it is folks, it's all in the title.  Ima geek for economics.  Which is why I'm "concentrating" in economics for my MBA.  In fact, I'm concentrating so hard on it, that I have to take 3 whole classes.

At the breakfast table, the blonde wouldn't stop staring at the orange juice container.  Why?  Because it say "100% concentrate".

Ba-da-dum!  Thanks, I'll be here all week!

On a side note, grad school has actually helped me become smarter.  I walked into the classroom I thought ECON 698 was taught in, looked at all the young, eager, fresh-faced kids, realized that they were in no way grad students, and left.  They looked at me kind of funny, but I ended up in the right classroom before the embarrassing "this class is BLAH 666, so if you're in the wrong classroom leave now.  Let's do roll."

Anyway....utility = happiness in economics.  For 5 years now, I've worked 30-45 hours a week while taking a full class load.  In the nine months I have left of college, I'm going to work 25 hours a weekend, and take the weekdays off.  And while I may not be happy this weekend flinging margaritas and wing jawns at people, this week has been one of the happiest of my college experience.  Hanging out with my cat (Nelly) and doing homework.  And sending ridiculous emails to my roommates.

For example:
----------------------------------------------------------
Subject:  the reason why nelly has three names
To:  my roomies

http://www.americanpoems.com/poets/tseliot/5536

bahahaha i wish i had actually planned this.

---------------------------------------------------------

The link is to TS Eliot (and no Google, I did not mean TS Elliot) and his poem about why cats have three names.  

My cat's name:  Nelly Shaniqua Furtado.  

I really do wish I had planned it.

ANYway.  There is no substance to this post.  But, maybe tomorrow?  OH WAIT.  17 hour shift tomorrow.  Maybe Monday!  If I can find time between hanging out with Nelly and sending my roommates annoying retarded emails.  I lead a rough life.  I know, I should write a book and sell the movie rights to Lifetime.

Headlines You Should Read:

Walmart has Saboteurs 

 What PA should do

Jimmy Eat World's New Album Rocks (and so does Liz's new blog header)

What Justin Bieber Said

 What Kurt Cobain Said Back

Trapped in a Box

Yes, I know.  Slacker.  Right here.  Haven't been blogging.  And I called someone out for not blogging during my fan-tabulous D.C. trip (which my host, Dave, should be guest blogging about soon).  There are a few reasons why, and I suppose I will try to explain my current frustration with people and the interwebs.

1.  I feel trapped.  I'm not sure what I want to do with the rest of my life, yet.  I'm in grad school (what comes next, I haven't decided!) and I have a long list of things I want to do.  For instance, take a tour of all of the major cities in the U.S., then abroad.  That takes money, as most of my endeavors do, which is frustrating and upsetting, seeings how I have none.

2.  I don't want a real person job.  So I've slacked on looking and slacked on interviews.  I feel bad about that, but somehow I'm hoping it'll work out.  Hence me working on a business plan.  Ya know, in all of that spare time I have lying around.

3.  People are really fucking inconsiderate, most of the time.  Obviously, this applies to little parts of life and to big ones.  Like...global warming.  Most people don't care right now, but their grandkids definitely will.  Also, the simple things.  Like....oh hey, I have my hands completely full of really heavy looking things and you just let the door slam on my face.  Thanks for taking the 0.5 seconds you saved by not helping me and applying them to solving world hunger.  I HOPE.

4.  I'm moving!  And packing!  And paying extra than I'm used to for rent!  And throwing/giving a lot of stuff away!

5.  Class + Work = Packed Schedule.

Anyway, tune in for more later.  But instead of updating 3 times or so a week, I'm going to cut down to about once a week.  There may be more enjoyment in it for you and me that way.

<3.

(Also, happy 21st birthday Loretta!!!)

It's Summertime & The Living's Easy

Things I couldn’t flesh out into full entries:

The internet is ending.  No, seriously.  It is.  CNN said so.  In other news, the supply of fresh seawater and fresh oil is almost depleted.  They will now be mixed.  Sorry for the inconvenience.

Yoko Ono is usually blamed for the end of the Beatles.  My roommate Liz informs me that Yoko Ono did NOT make the Beatles break up because blah, blah, blah (sorry Liz, I didn’t pay attention, I was focusing on sangria).  However, had the Beatles not broken up when they did, they might be look back upon like the Backstreet Boys – some catchy songs but should’ve ended it while it was good.  Oh, wait. What did the Backstreet Boys sing again?

Since when did interviews get so intense?  I had to take a test.  It was like the third grader version of the GMATs but still!  At least it went fairly well, here’s to hoping!

Work has been super slow lately.  All the Penn kids have left and I am stuck with making $85 on a weeknight (excluding Friday) instead of $150.  I was extremely bored the entire time.  At least I got to watch the Flyers game Monday.  Oh, and write an Art History paper.   Oh, and play 14 rounds of hangman.  Oh, and eat a million and one donuts. 

Anyway….I didn’t bring a book to work Monday because I didn’t know who was managing and whether or not I would get in trouble.  I will not be making that mistake tonight though.  While I was buying my cap and gown ($100 by the way, WTF) I found “Waiter Rant” in the bargain bin.  HECK. YES.  So excited to read it.

And last but not least, let me add that this is my last week of undergraduate classes.  I’m rather torn up about it, as I usually am when leaving something so familiar.  Every year, my birthday falls during finals week.  Normally, I just celebrate and don’t study.  This year however, college has given me its first gift.

ALL of my finals fall directly on my birthday.  But, because I’m a graduating senior, I don’t have to take any of them. 

Dear University,

Thanks for removing the shaft as a final farewell & happy birthday gift by exempting graduating seniors from finals which all fall directly on my birthday.

Here's a check for $8,000 for my first term of grad school tuition.

xoxo,
Andrea

Beach this weekend??

Comics and Whatnot

I may be going insane.  Or I may be hungover.  Or I may be going through nicotine withdrawal.  Or I may just be burnt out.  Or all of the above.  (If this was a multiple choice question on the exam of my life, the correct answer would be the last option.)

So I'm just going to share some hilarious comics I've found over the past few days on the internets.  I was going to blog about how I hate bread, but the humor in me is as dry as a post-menopausal woman's...hair...GET YOUR MIND OUT OF THE GUTTER.

But put it back in the gutter for this one:

Now substitute that orange looking thing with this bitch:

Isn't she adorable??

Next up, to compliment my roomie Liz's blog post about boys and our countless conversations about how Disney/Hollywood ruined our expectations for a perfect boy:

We were right.  It was all bullpoop.  Speaking of poop...
I told two friends yesterday that poop is super important.  Depending on what comes out you are either healthy or not.  Because Scrubs told me so.



For your reference, here is a chart of poo.

You're welcome.

These last two are self explanatory and I have no good segwey for them.  I just don't want the last thing you take away from this edition of Stooptime to be poop.  Just so there are no unconscious pairings going on.

I'm toying with the idea of deleting Facebook.  But I would need moral support.  And a peer support group.  And another networking outlet.

Steve Jobs?  Bill Gates?  What you got cooking in those little tech companies of yours?

Asshats.  (Thanks for making this blog possible.)

Enjoy this Wednesday.  It's super warm.  OH, and don't forget to hold your breath until 10 p.m.  Apparently the air is toxic right now.  Air Warning #1 AND #2 are in effect people!!

We love to talk on things we don't know about

I'm not ready to graduate. I'm not ready for the real world. Don't get me wrong, I'm so sick of classes and pointless exams and endless homework. And I can totally survive in the real world. No doubt.

I just don't want to.

Mostly because I have no idea what I want to do or who I truly am. When people are like "oh, what are you doing after graduation" the people that can't find themselves say "Peace Corps. [insert bumblefuck country here] is gonna be so fun. The people really need help there." Everyone knows that they are just delaying things and trying to immerse themselves in a completely different culture and feel good about it at the same time, without paying a large sum of money. The Peace Corps are a great idea. My answer to the dreaded question however is "grad school."

What I'm actually going to do is sort out my morals, values, and beliefs and try to figure out a way to live in harmony with myself because this dissonance is getting super annoying. Like a Cascada song on repeat when you're trying to sleep.

First things first, I'm giving up a shift at work. While I plan on quitting the restaurant job that eats my soul away bite by bite in June, for now giving up one shift could drastically change my outlook on life. Who needs to work Sunday morning anyway. It's only like a $7-$100 day anyway. And usually I'm super hungover and stressed about all of the schoolwork I have to get done before midnight. It's not the solution I need to "finding myself" or whatever, but it will be a small start.

For now, I'll plan on being happy eventually. I also plan on owning my own island and laying in a hammock for at least 3 months out of the year, sipping sangria and listening to music mixed with the sound of the ocean hitting the beach.

In other news, I'd like to pose 3 questions.

1.) If a family friend sent you a $100 check as a random gift, would you feel guilty cashing it?

2.) I saw a professor's facebook page. His profile picture was a shirtless portrait. Interesting or weird? Also, fired or hired?

3.) Liz, did you finish your homework yet?

More posts later. After grad school orientation.

Mi Amigo

I've been thinking about growing up lately.

No really, I've been thinking about the past 4 years that I've spent in Philly and all of the people I've met, worked with, partied with, and formed connections with. Literally, the past 4 years has been a huge growth experience that many people from my town never got because they haven't left the county since they were in high school. If I ever leave, I know I'll lose touch with a lot of people, but there are some I know will always be around...

My friend Dave came up this weekend. He lives in D.C. and is by far the most ridiculous person I know. Not bad ridiculous. Ridiculous as in - the MOST RIDICULOUS THINGS HAPPEN TO HIM EVER . Dave is a pretty normal guy, he's super nice and we get along great. Definitely someone I plan on keeping around forever because he has one unique talent that I need to learn - he makes partying productive and random. Oh, and he's the only person that will never say no to a good time. (Oh, and a BILLION other reasons).

I want to publish the ridiculous stories he tells me that (are super hard to believe but I know) are true. Alas, he would probably go to jail on about 25 different counts of things ranging from murder to grand theft auto to cartel running. In fact, last night as we were in the middle of a group of friends drinking, I heard him say something about finding a card. I immediately knew that he was the person I read a news article about where some dude.........see I have to stop here. Because I love Dave. And I don't want the cops bustin' down my door and force feeding me truth serum until I turn in someone who is harmless.

Moving on, I just got a new MacBook. It was delivered a few hours before Dave randomly decided to drive to Philly because he was supposed to move but then his landlord randomly decided to let him live rent free until August. SEE WHAT I MEAN ABOUT THIS DUDE?!?!?!?! Luckily, Dave knows a lot about computers and hooked me up with stuff (what stuff, I have hardly a clue, but I pretty sure he's the reason I have any software). While he was doing this, we were partying like non-other. In fact, when my roommate got up to do the Broad Street Run (what a healthy asshat) he was amazed that we were both still up with Dave bent over both a PC and a Mac and me bent over a Cap't Morgan bottle......

What my roommate doesn't know is the one random (AND COMPLETELY LEGAL) thing that happened to us. So we were sitting on my stoop at 4:20 a.m. (okay, I may have lied about it being completely legal) and we're listening to the birds chirp, talking about Dave's antics and my blog and a publishing deal (we determined this will never happen due to the whole jail thing...maybe when the statue of limitations runs out on every crime ever committed...or when hell freezes over...or when pigs fly...). All of the sudden we hear a whizzzzz, PLOP! and see a bird that has just fallen out of a tree about 10 feet away from where we are sitting. I tell Dave we'll wait 10 minutes before we go over to take a picture just in case whatever killed this bird and made it fall out of the tree wants to eat it. We took a gazillion pictures.

Twenty minutes later the bird was gone. The sidewalk was clear of all corpses.

WTF.

The moral of me talking about Dave is that I had an entirely unproductive (but I have a laptop that works perfectly so semi-productive) weekend which included two trips to the liquor store, very little sleep, and Dave. If I was a crazy (oh, wait) I would be hating on myself for not getting stuff done. Luckily, I applied for a job today. Just one. But hello productivity!

Alcohol: A Solution

Last night at The Pit (dingy, underlit, can-smoke-inside, after hours kind of bar) one of my coworkers said "I have something called a drinking problem." I responded in kind "It's more of a drinking solution."

Well maybe it's both.

Obviously, I did not update my blog. Go figure. Real life happened. And stuff. There was probably alcohol involved. Not gonna lie. Will do it soon. Soon being anywhere from tomorrow until three/six months from now. Eventually....we'll leave it at that.

In the meantime, I want to talk about my "connects". And dumb boys. I know, I know, how do these relate? Well....sit back, take a swig of rum, at let me tell you the story.

There's this new boy. And as always, my mouth will ruin it. NOT IN THAT WAY GET YOUR MIND OUT OF THE GUTTER. My issue is I work with this boy, and I canNOT help but have mouth diarrhea constantly about him and how much I would love to.........well, ya know (you may now insert your mind back into the gutter) while I'm AT WORK. And he's there too. Unclassy, unprofessional, and I'm a little disturbed by myself. So I have made a pact to stop talking about him. Period. Done. Fin. At work. At the top of my lungs.

Anyway.

This boy has a tattoo. And we hung out the other night and ended up talking about tattoos. Luckily, my bfffffffffxinfinity works at a tattoo shop! Which mean I have a connection that he can make use of. That we can make use of together actually, which makes my end goal all the more attainable.

So now this boy thinks I have a lot of connections. He brings up a good point. I know a lot of people, I meet a lot of people, people like doing things for me and I like hooking people up. So maybe I have a few connections. Showcased in the fact that I'm getting a brand new MacBook Pro for $875 instead of $1200. Which is AWESOME. If I can figure out how to work it.

My solution to the boy problem is alcohol. On Sunday, I shall get a lil tipsy, go to roller derby, hang out with all of my awesome friends, impress him with my awesome friends and maybe awesome outfit, and then drunkenly make out a lil. Maybe. If I can grow some imaginary balls.

Can some of my "connects" help me out with that? Doubt it.

My real plan: to do nothing. I have no idea. And I hate thinking about boys. Ima ride the wave and see what happens. If anything does, I have no doubt a little liquid courage will help me out a lot. Otherwise, I'm resting on my laurels. And my connections. Thanks guys.

Unwaxed Poetic

Some say the world will end in fire,

Some say in ice.

From what I've tasted in desire

I hold with those that favor fire.

But if I had to perish twice,

I think I know enough of hate

To say that destruction ice

Is also great

And would suffice.

-Robert Frost

Mondays and Wednesdays kill me. Every. Single. Week. I'm exhausted. And this morning I got called out by a professor. So far, we've turned in one assignment that I failed horribly because I just forgot to do it and we've taken exactly one test. After he was done handing back the assignment and test together, he pulled me aside and told me he expected better from the way I participate in class and carry myself. The girl sitting next to me (we're those "oh hey how ya doing let's sit by each other so we can wake each other up all the time" friends, not too close but very handy) got a worse grade than I did on each paper and all she got was a little "eh, do a little better". Why? How could my professor tell?

My work friend told me today "you're just not good at hiding your intelligence." Which I suppose is fair, but I'm not sure why. What is it that makes my intelligence come out? Especially at work? Slinging burritos and margaritas isn't exactly rocket science. In fact, most of the staff is inebriated (in one way or another) most of the time. The other half are just plain lunatics.

And the way I talk? I don't pronounce many words right and I also have a slightly limited vocabulary. (Listen, I grew up with a Southern dad, a Pennsylvania Dutch mother, the first three years of my life I heard Long Islanders speak, and then I spent most of my education in Central Bumfuck PA - talk about a myriad of accents). And I have annoying habits like saying "anyway" ALL OF THE TIME as a conversation ender/segue. Or "so" or "well" or "uhhhhhhhhh, so yea".

Plus, I picture most really intelligence people as well dressed, on time, studious expression, eye contact, normal social skills, and sort of conservative looking. I am always wearing a restaurant T-shirt and cut offs with ugly black sneakers. I am perpetually 15 minutes late. Mouth open, eyes unblinking does NOT count as a studious expression last time I checked. Eye contact? What's that? Normal social skills? I was awkward at so many tables to day. The awkward was palpable. As for sort of conservative looking? I have 4 to many piercings and the attire on that I mentioned above.

But I do have this going for me: people do invite me along places because they wanna hang out and make decent conversation. Intelligent people are required for decent conversations. Therefore, I must either make decent conversation or be intelligent. Right?

Oh, logic.

Toy with me not!

I believe you,

I just don't know.

- Andrea

Time has Escaped

My life is busy. And I've been feeling unmotivated to write blog posts. Mostly because now I only have time to write one a week and I have about 24,690,712,999 topics I'd like to post about in a week. I work about 36-42 hours a week, go to 19 hours of class, and when I get an hour of free time, drinks and TV are in order.

However, I have about 20 minutes to waste because I finished a test early. A test in a class that I have been called out for sleeping twice. The first time (picture the professor talking in a jovial Bulgarian accent):

"An-drey-a, am I boring you?"
"No, sir. I'm just super tired and didn't have time to get coffee because walking in late to a class just because I got coffee seems rude. Yes, I walked in late without coffee because somehow that made more sense?"

The second time (after break in the next class):
"An-drey-a, coffee really helps you, eh?"
Timid smile and a "cheers" motion

While I forgot to do the homework and probably recieved a 50% on it, I definetly nailed that test to the refrigerator door.

In other news, has anyone else noticed the skimpy clothes girls should NOT be wearing? I get a lot of chances to people watch because I have random 10 minute breaks when I sit outside with my roommate Liz while we complain about boys and classes while laughing at people who look ridiculous in short shorts. Do these people not own mirrors? At the same time I hope no one judges me as harshly because Lord knows I frequently forget (don't have time) to shower or look in the mirror. Yesterday I almost came to campus with one eye maked-uped and the other one not.

Oh boy.

Off to class, then work. Maybe another, more interesting and funny post tomorrow?

Doubtful.

Slainte!

Needs a Notebook

This one needs....a new liver. AND a notebook. AND a better work schedule with more money and less work. Preferably.

I feel like the only thing I can do about the above list though is buy a damn notebook already. Cuz a liver costs a little bit too much. And the only way to do the last thing is find a sugar daddy. And I tried that already. It was fun, but....well, that's another story for another day.

About the notebook. I have a lot of ideas for blog posts. And for potential businesses. But I fail to write them down. Or if I do, it's on the back of a receipt from Wawa that gets thrown away with the bag, or covered in cat poo when I clean out Nelly's litter.

I love her and I love business ideas and I love blogging. But I'm not digging through ammonia and cat poo to pull out a receipt that may or may not have a million dollar idea on it. Or an entertaining one. I feel like it crosses a hypothetical line that I feel sometimes needs to be thrown down in my life so I can toe at it.

Anyway. I need a notebook. One that fits in a messenger bag and has a spot for a pen that I can't lose.

If I had a notebook I might be blogging about a ton of things. Such as:

1. Having a notebook.

2. Central PA and my awesome adventures there.

3. Cultural differences among races in urban areas. The melting pot paradox if you will.

4. How I love my spiffy, hipster-looking notebook.

5. Funny or ironic things. Like Hiney Hiders.

6. How I have a perfect entrepreneurial personality. (We're talking about it in class...characteristics: hates failure, obsessive, works over 60 hours a week, competitive, etc).

7. About how I didn't have a pen, but I had my notebook, which means I had a pen.

8. The other 37 ideas I had for interesting blog posts this week while I didn't have internet.

9. How I need a job. And ideas for getting one.

10. Schmandrew Schmangle mangles management. Or bathroom graffiti. Which would lead me on an interesting/slightly eccentric discussion about murals in Philly.

11. How jealous I am of my best friend's notebook. Actually all of my male best friends' have notebooks that make me green with envy.

12. My new work crush. Who is adorable.

In lieu of writing about any of those 11 things, I'm going to go back to "paying attention" in class. This term will surely kick my butt. Yay graduating senior!!

It's the Small Things

I have about 15 minutes to get ready and get to work, so today's post will be short. I promise more scintillating posts later. Like tomorrow. Or whenever Comcast (Xfinity) chooses to grace me with the internet service I pay more than $100/month for.

Have you ever been in the bathroom and heard someone randomly giggling? Like there's something to giggle about in the bathroom. There's stalls, sometimes graffitti, underwear, a chance that mother nature gave you a gift (ladies), a fear of farting, some TP and not a whole lot else going on. Chances are if someone is giggling it is over a text message or it's me, laughing at something like this:

Haha, Hiney Hider, haha. Someone is funny in the marketing department.

Okay, hi ho, hi ho, it's off to work I go!

There's a light

At the end of this dark, dark tunnel. Finals are approaching. Or should I say final. Yea, that's right, I only have one!!

Unfortunately, I have about 10 hours of research to do. Tonight. Right now actually...

Sorry I've been slacking on the blog. Work has been killing me but I've been making lots of money!! It doesn't quite make up for the fact that I'm so tired I want to crawl into the fetal position in the bottom of a closet and stay there for a week, butttttttt at least I'm not broke. Yes - if I owe you money I'll pay you on Friday!

The real reason I've been slacking is the fact that my life is a mess right now. While I don't mind airing dirty laundry once in awhile, I'd at least like to gather it up first and figure out what still fits and what doesn't. In other words, I have a lot to blog about, but most is too personal, sappy, dirty, or just plain depressing. For me at least. You'd probably get a kick out of it!

Ahhh, I remember what I wanted to say! Winter has broken here in Philly!! It may be cold a few more days, but we had BEAUTIFUL weather the past few days and spring has definitely knocked on winter's door. As always, spring will win out in the end. And it brings me a small ray of hope. For something.

I think I'll buy skates.

But first, I need to do mounds of research for economics. If you need me, I'll be stabbing myself while sobbing uncontrollably over my laptop.

I'm not just slacking...

...my internet really hasn't been working lately. Why? Well, I have an oooollldddddd laptop. As old as father time. It's almost a preschooler - really. And the wireless card needs updated. Or some setting needs to be changed. Or something.

I took a class in computers once, no really I did....

End of story - something's messed up, and until I update my wireless card I can't do anything about it. So what I am doing with this precious sprig of internet time? I writing a blog post about how I can't write blog posts because my laptop is in it's terrible twos, threes, AND fours.

Also, I'm working approximately 40 hours a week and going to college full time. Last week I worked 46 hours. This week is 36. Next week is 40. I'm tired.

In the meantime, please visit http://envisioncolorcontest.com/gallery/entry/85 and vote for my friend to win. She is awesome, and she could really use the money - i.e. she works AND goes to school.

While I might have fixed the problem since I wrote this at 3:00 a.m. yesterday, it's still all true.

Kloveme.

Melatonin and the Circadian Cycle

Working at the restaurant has completely messed up my sleep cycle. It is currently 4:30 a.m. Recently, I've been waking up between 4 a.m. and 6 a.m., doing a bunch of homework, then going back to sleep. I mean, there's not much to do at 4 a.m., not a lot of distractions, and if I'm wide awake I might as well be up doing the work I don't have time to do otherwise.

Now the questions is, do I want to take melatonin or some other sleep aid to help me out? For now, I think the answer is no. For one thing, I put enough shit into my body, I don't think another hormone is a good idea. For another thing, if I didn't have random bursts of energy at 4 a.m., I might not be able to handle life.

Now, to share something I found rather hilarious. Lyla, Liz, and myself hung out the other night in an epic tale of awesomeness (not that anything extraordinary happened, but we are pretty much the shiznit). We happened to purchase pineapple soda to mix with vodka from the corner (ghetto) store. I pulled it out of the refrigerator.

So obviously, looking at the bottle I was like "Cool, Large 2 Liter. What makes it large?" I looked on the labeling, saw that the bottom said 2 Liters (67.6 fluid oz). So, I was confused, and I told Liz and Lyla that.

Then I turned the bottle about 45 degrees clockwise.

BAHAHAHAHAHA. It's 100% more than a 1 Liter. BAHAHAHAHA. Makes TOTAL sense now. That's why it's a "big" 2 liter. I feel like the pineapple soda had a little issue with it's size, so it compensated by using different labeling. I like it, it's a lot more productive than a lot of other over-compensating...did I just say tha...wha???

[And now an apology to my two biggest blog fans for rehashing exactly what happened the other night. To be fair, I warned you. XOXO]

In other news, I MIGHT BE ABLE TO GO TO CHILE FOR FREE!!! I'm trying not to be super excited about this prospect but I totally am. If I get picked, I get to spend a week in Santiago blogging about life, for free. Yes. I am stoked. Let's see, one week working at the restuarant vs. one week in Chile. Blogging. For free. And drinking. Lots. For free. And taking pictures. For free. It's like they are offering a deal tailored specifically to me. Free booze, food, nice hotel, warm weather, and all for the small price of blogging. Which I love doing anyway. Bring it on. Here's to hoping.

Currently the weather is snowy - and Nelly is my only distraction. Isn't she adorable?

Or she would be adorable if you could see ANY picture of her where her entire body didn't look like a giant black blob.

Off to finish my homework and then go to bed. I'm pretty sure Economics will put me to sleep, if writing about the European Union doesn't do the trick.

Random Thoughts

1. I'm really superduper hungry.

2. I'm superduper bored. In class. What IS he talking about? I have no idea but this International Business homework will be done soon.

3. Should bring laptop to class more often. Good distraction tool. And it looks like I'm taking notes.

4. I like snow. Especially when it doesn't stick to the ground. I mean, come on, it's better than rain.

5. My second day off this week, working for the next 4 days in a row is gonna suck. But I'll have money to fuel my alcoholism.

6. It's sad that my favorite blogger got fired from her job because she blogged about it constantly. But, her job sucked and I'm happy for her. I even trekked to Washington DC to meet her. Secretly glad I got on the wrong bus and didn't make it because I think it would've been weird to be like "HEY, I just came from Philly to meet you. Now I'm gonna be awkward and hang out in a corner with my half-price beer and my new 2b1b sticker which I will cherish forever."

7. I love my darker hair. Next rainy day, I'm totally doing it again.

8. I hate when corporate comes to our local restaurant. I could've left at 2:00 a.m. instead of 2:45 a.m. this morning, except the effin dude from corporate would not stop drinking and got drunk and would've yelled if we did last call early, even though there were NO CUSTOMERS left. What an asshat. He also yelled at me for pulling the straw wrappers off the straws because "your hands are dirty."

9. Do you know how many things are dirty in that restaurant. My hands will touch multiple "clean" pieces of silverware, we literally just wash glasses with hot water, there are fucking mice EVERYWHERE, someone found a bucket of mold chillin' out in a refrigerator, and my hands will touch every effin, gd tortilla chip that people eat. And when he yelled about me about the straws I thought of all of this. And instead of making an argument and inevitably making life harder for everyone, I said "blokay" and continued pulling off all of the straw wrappers. Fire me. Do it. I dare you.

10. I still have no idea what the professor is talking about.

11. I may get a free weeklong trip to Chile in 3 weeks. Go me.

12. This homework needs to get done. I wonder if I could pay someone.

13. THAT guy is in Atlantic City for a few days, and after another weekend (emotional) roller-coaster ride I'm over it. Obviously I still care and do not mind making the occasional(ly frequent) hotel stay-over but I'm over wanting a relationship. Thank goodness. It's just not me, especially when there's no future involved.

14. The other day he waited to meet me after class and got a $26 parking ticket. Oh, sweet irony.

15. I promise a better, more coherent and paragraph full post later, when I don't feel like a braindead, overworked, hungry, hungry hippo.

16. 30 minutes left to not pay attention and do my homework. Good luck.

Motivation

Yesterday in my management class, you know, the one that's my major, we watched a video from the 70s or 80s. Usually, I fall asleep, skip, and am utterly unprepared for class. I just can't care, and I'm smart, and being smart and apathetic is a very dangerous combination.

However, this video reminded my why I'm in school for entrepreneurship/business. It was Russell Ackoff talking about Bell Laboratories. Back in the '50s he was visiting a friend who was a section leader for Bell. The friend tried to call him to tell him not to come down for the day, but Ackoff ended up going to the office and following his friend to a huge meeting that revolutionized the way Bell Laboratories did business, and ALSO revolutionized the telephone.

The VP of the company decided to do an idealized re-design. Basically, he told everyone that the telephone system of the United States had been destroyed, and in the next year they would redesign it with only two restraints: it must be technically feasible and operationally viable.

And this guy, who didn't even work at Bell Labs helped develop the telephone as we know it in 1951. They developed push buttons, caller ID, hold functions, speaker phone, cell phones, everything. Everything we've seen in a phone and things we have yet to see in a phone, all developed in 1951.

This is something I can get excited about. Not telephones exactly, but helping do something that is so vital to everyone's life. Think about the creative aspects involved. The possibilities, the fun that business could be.

And the bragging rights.

I need some motivation to get through the next two terms. And I just found it.