Parties and Such

I've been wanting to post an update for a few weeks, and there have been two reasons why I haven't.  1) I haven't been doing so well going to the gym or eating well - not terribly, but not awesome.  Like mediocre.  That's been making me feel bad and generally bringing my mood down.  2)  My computer has been sucking balls.  It's a few (read 5-6) years old and the insides were getting gunky.  You know the drill - 5 minutes to switch between browser tabs, etc.  

But I have great news - I overcame my computer problems and fixed them myself.  And now it works great.  Even though I apparently need new RAM or memory or both or something.

Last night, the throwback PSP party happened!  I organized it, no big deal, and it went off without a hitch despite my irrational anxiety about it beforehand.  The cops only came once and we kicked the keg and everyone seemed to have a really great time.  Success!  There were a few people who were unable to come that I really would have loved to see, but, there's always another time.  I also handled my anxiety really well during the entire thing - didn't black out, paced myself, and was sober without spins when I got home.  Also didn't have that usual drunk shame the next day.

My overall blahness is still around.  I'm going to the gym all this week, so that should help.  Otherwise, I just need another hobby or project or something to work on.  I was working on cleaning my crap up and starting to digitize all of my old paper files that are hanging around.  But that's less than inspiring.

So, I don't know, we'll see.  I feel like January and February are always the hardness months for me personally to shake off my depression and anxiety issues.  Especially with all the changes that have been going on lately.  Guess I"ll just keep on keeping on.

Bad (eating) decisions

As all of you humans know, pizza is really good.  Like, really delicious.  The gooey cheese oozing it's delicious cheese juice, on top of wonderful red tomato sauce that is seasoned perfectly.  The bottom is a crust that was perfectly baked in a brick oven, that holds the tomato sauce and cheese just enough that you can fold that sucker in half and shove it in your mouth.

I ate 6 slices yesterday.

And half of a red velvet cupcake.

Last week, I worked really hard and lost 3 lbs.  And then ate enough calories to gain 2 lbs back in one day.

In the past, I've done this and then just quit my diet plan and working out routine.  Maybe not right away, but little by little, I'll cheat more and more, until that scale is back up and working out is the last thing I want to do.

Since doing the same thing over and over will gain the same results, and I'm looking for different results, I changed up my attitude this time.  Instead of beating myself up, I'm letting it go.  I'm trying to look at the silver lining, instead of eating 1/2 of a pizza for lunch and 1/2 of a pizza for dinner, I only ate 3 slice each meal.  Not a lot, but better than usual.

Today, I made myself go out in 20 degree weather and spent a luxurious 2 hours at the gym.  I've eaten well so far, and dinner is going to be healthy.  My meals and workout schedule is planned for the week, and I'm sticking to it.

Enjoy my motivational pictures from Muffintopless who I highly recommend you follow on tumblr or on Instagram (@muffintopless).

Sweet Sunday Afternoons

My laundry is done, the apartment is clean(er), and my lunch and breakfast are cooked for the week.  Sunday nights would be the best nights, if only it didn't mean that Monday morning inevitably starts the next day.

I just read this article about having a day of rest; the Sabbath literally means "rest" or "cease".  The article argued that doctors should not only ask patients if they smoke, exercise, or eat cheesesteaks for dinner every night, but also ask people how much they are working and how much they rest.  In today's society, it's important to ask these questions because stress can lead to all kinds of bad things.  When we have cell phones and social networks and jobs that never rest, we never get a break from everything.  Makes sense.

There's just so much to do and try!

Today I did three brand new things, which is quite a lot for a usually restful day.  This morning, I swallowed my fears surrounding touching people, and went to JuJitsu class.  I wasn't very good and there was a lot of touching and being close to people.  Pondering whether or not to return on my bus ride home, I realized I would probably go back for the sheer learning of a new thing.  I also realized I would probably be mad at myself for the first few classes for choosing to do such an uncomfortable thing.

Second brand new thing:  juicing.  My wonderful boyfriend got my a Breville juicer for Christmas and I hadn't taken it out of the box until today.  It seemed like a lot of work to clean and figure it out.  And I was scared of messing it up.  Seems silly, right?  One apple, carrot, kale and broccoli juice later, I'm so happy I tried it!  I just wish juice stayed fresher for longer.

Have you ever tried baked hard "boiled" eggs?  Well I will tomorrow, because for the first time, I made them tonight.  It's the minor things, people.

My whole being active and healthy thing has been going really well for these past two weeks, but next Sunday, I am taking a break and resting.  I cannot face another Monday being this tired.

It's the little things

In my opinion, it's the little things that you have to recognize, admire, and do to keep going in this life where so much around us goes terribly.  

My resolutions for January - no alcohol and lots of gym visits - has been going very well.  Except for the whole early morning gym thing.  I only went once.  Evenings work much better; I can skip happy hour and go to the gym instead.  

With everything going on in life, it's so easy to get discouraged and make excuses to not do whatever your resolution is.  Whether it be reading more, working out, volunteering, or just being more positive.  We've got to start being nicer to ourselves, stop beating ourselves up.  Take a breath and notice the little things, give ourselves credit where credit is due.

Today at boxing, I noticed one of those little things.  I can do burpees so much better than before!  Burpees are this evil, tortured exercise - you start standing up, you put your hands on the floor, throw your feet out so you are in push up position, then jump your feet back to your hands, and jump up into a standing position.

When I first started working out, I couldn't do two of these in a row without dying.  Today, the 3 minutes (not consecutively) of burpees, didn't exhaust me nearly as much as they used to.  In fact, they were almost easy!  Not too easy, but not like swimming through cement.  See - it's the small things.

My weight doesn't go down that much week to week, but it's these little things I notice, like burpees becoming easier, push-ups getting stronger, runs getting faster, that keep me going to the gym.  It's okay to take pride in the small things, no matter how silly they seem! 

And that goes for everything - not just fitness goals.

Thanksgiving and Weight Issues

I had a great trip home.  I took time to be thankful for my family, my job, and my life.  I have a wonderful boyfriend who really makes my life better everyday and great friends!  Nothing is perfect, it is what it is.  And all-in-all, life's good.  I'm not homeless, unemployed or utterly alone.  Winning!

The only thing that was wrong with going home:  not enough vegetables!!!

I, as many people in America, struggle with those extra pounds.  Lately, I've been making efforts to work out more regularly.  With two gym memberships, I am exercising at least 5 hours a week, usually 7-10.  However, I constantly overeat.  Food is just SO GOOD GUYS.

In an effort to be better this week - me and the bf just made a grocery list and I'm going to cook breakfast for all week today.  My menu this week:

Breakfast:  oatmeal casserole, greek yogurt and a banana
Lunch:  turkey sandwich, vegetable soup, carrots, and an apple
Dinner:  vegetable (kale, broccoli, cauliflower or salad) and a pre-portioned frozen meal

We've decided to try pre-packaged meals for dinner for portion control to see if that works for a few weeks.  I'm not super excited about the idea, but I'm willing to see what happens.  After Christmas, I want to buy a juicer and start a modified Paleo diet.  I really want to see what it's like not to eat processed foods for awhile.


For now, I want to share this great oatmeal casserole recipe I got from my parents.  It's super delicious and great for cutting up into bars for all week.  It's awesome cold or warm!

Baked Oatmeal:

3 cups oatmeal
1 cup packed brown sugar
2 eggs
1 cup milk (or almond milk)
3-4 cups of applesauce (depending on how moist you like your oatmeal)
2 tsp baking powder
2 tsp cinnamon
nuts and seasonal fruit, optional

Pre-heat oven to 350 degrees.  Mix all ingredients, put in a rectangular baking dish (11x7 ish).  Bake for 35 minutes.

Today, I'm going to make this with apples - I think next week I'm going to do bananas and strawberries!  I'm also going to get chia seeds at the grocery store today and add those for extra nutritional value.

What will you put in your baked oatmeal?