10.15.2009

Student Loans

Unfortunately, I'm graduating with debt. Fortunately, Drexel has taught me how to avoid paying it!

All a student loan is is a contract between someone with money and someone who wants to learn that says "Here is money, pay me back more later." The broke person signs it and continues to be broke until they are 25-30 years old.

Contract law: What does there need to be for a contract to exist?
1. Agreement between at least two parties that was entered by mutual assent to be bound.
2. Must be supported by consideration. (I.e. both parties are receiving something from the deal).
3. The parties must have legal capacity.
4. The contract must not be for illegal purposes or contrary to public policy.

If any of those four conditions are not met, then a contract does not exist and neither party is bound by it. So here's how I'm not going to pay my student loan bills.

Number 1: I didn't want to agree, I had no choice. I really don't want to pay back the $572,893,000 I owe. And I don't like commitment. And, I don't want to be bound (sounds like a painful S&M scene that will go on after I graduate. The government will have handcuffs and a whip...)

Number 2: I received nothing from this deal. All I got were some lousy classes and more pain-in-the-ass-bullshit-run-arounds than I bargained for. And I still work 30+ hours a week so I can live.

Number 4: The contract was definitely contrary to public policy. I am by far the smartest human being in the world and could totally take it over. The money I got enabled me to get the education I needed for world dominance. Now if that's not against public policy, I don't know what is.

And the last argument I have to get me out of school loans is one that might actually work.

Number 3: I lacked the legal capacity because I WAS DRUNK. [Not really, but it's not out of the realm of possibility...so SHHHH don't tell anyone!]

And, goodbye student loans! And thank you for paying for BLAW 340 so I could learn how not pay you back!

(Yes, I'm being facetious, I don't actually think this is gonna work).


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